Saturday Night Fever... literally.

This is my favorite song at the moment. I LOVE MISS A! <3

Aside from the fact that the essence and mindset of "Girl Power" has been marketed to young girls over and over throughout the years, I really do love this song. So maybe that marketing worked on me. BIG DEAL! I love the message of this song because it's empowering to women. It's not that we're denying any existence or help from a man, but it's simply saying that we have the capability to make it on our own. I'm a believer in that men and women have their own strengths and weaknesses, but we really should be seen as equals. I'm not sure if South Korea ever marketed this idea of "Girl Power" before this song came out, but I'm glad Miss A is doing it now! It's such an inspiring message to young girls and even older generations of women who feel like their relationships or marriage are in a rut.

I realized it's been a long time since I last posted. SOOO much has happened. Lots of bad, some good, all around crazy and hectic. First and foremost, I'm super stressed academic-wise. I haven't been studying or keeping up with material as much as I should have and now I'm trying my best to just pass my classes. I've been playing with the thought of dropping my Journalism minor because right now, I'm not doing so hot in my Jour 430 class (Media Law). I don't want to admit I'm taking the easy way out, since I literally only have 2 more classes to take for my minor and I'm done, but I'm realizing that whether or not I have a Journalism degree, my resume will be fine. I talked to an undergrad advisor and she told me it's really how I sell myself in my interviews. She told me just saying, "I took some classes in the Journalism department so I have experience" will suffice, and I can always show writing samples from those classes. Now I feel really dumb. -____- So I never had to pick up a minor?! But I don't think of it as a waste of time because these Journalism classes really helped me discover what I truly wanted to do in my life. The entertainment/media industry is so difficult to get into, and also difficult to prove you can make it out there. But I know I'm a hard worker who can prove herself when push comes to shove.

I've realized a lot about myself so far in my senior year of college. I've realized I work undeniablly hard at anything I do, as long as I'm passionate about it. So if I feel I'm not passionate, I don't work AS hard. Pretty simple concept, yes? It can perceived as a good or bad thing. I've also realized I cannot work at 4am to save my life. Work is also super stressing me out. I remember why I can't ever work mornings... I can't freakin wake up. I've gotten in so much shit at work, that I'm desperate. All I can do is hold on to this job until I can get hired elsewhere. I've been applying to a lot of different jobs and I'm praying someone will realize I'm a good candidate for a position. If someone just gave me the chance to prove myself in an interview, I can guarantee I won't let anyone down. Still praying. Still hoping. I'll keep you updated on that.

I've also realized I spread myself WAY too thin this semester. For some reason, I thought I can be Super Woman and just take on all this shit because I'm graduating and it's gonna look good on my resume, and personally, I want to do all these things NOW. But I've realized if any other person had this workload, they'd go nuts. Just as I am right now. I really do need to take a step back and think about what's most important. Life just got the best of me these past couple weeks and I'm trying so desperately hard to make a comeback and keep my energy up. Lesson learned.

Luckily for me, I've found some relaxing outlets to keep my mind sane as I go through all this chaos. I finally put some good use for my tablet, and I bought The Hunger Games for my Kindle app. I'm already on chapter 4, and I'm pretty addicted. I can't wait to finish the book so I can watch the movie! I think this is one popular trilogy I will go to a midnight showing for. I think in general, just reading regular books again since... I don't even know... is relaxing to me. Granted, I should be studying court cases and getting ready for my debate on Monday, but The Hunger Games is just so much more interesting!! Ehh, oh well. I know how to argue... sorta. I definitely know how to be passionate, and I feel once I read this entire court case of Citizens United v. FEC, I can get into character and make magic happen. Yeahh... hopefully.

It's 8:26 PM on a Saturday night. Some of my DZK sisters went out clubbing tonight, but I decided to just sit back and relax tonight. I was super tired from Friendship Games (even though we didn't play in anything LOL. Just being in the heat was tiring!!) I'm waiting for Robert to get off at work, then tomorrow morning is DZK Brunch! I'm sooooo excited! Brunch is one of my favorite DZK events because we bring all our families together. And my mom is actually coming!!!! So crazy. My mom never comes to shit like this, haha. But I hope I get better before tomorrow. I recently got a cold/fever sometime this week and it's really annoying. I've been taking medicine, but I haven't been resting as much as I should have. But hopefully I get better so I can enjoy tomorrow. :)

Oh and before I conclude this post, if anyone knows of any jobs hiring, please let me know. Preferably something in the PR field... or at least a media/entertainment related job. Please... no more food or customer service. I can only take so much. ;___;

<3Ally

Lazy Sundays: Angry Rant

Current mood: FML

When I saw this picture of Sakura from Cardcaptor Sakura, I knew I had to use it to describe how I feel at the moment. A surge of nostalgia totally washed over me though when I saw this pic. Cardcaptor Sakura was the first anime I watched entirely in its original Japanese format. This is the anime that got me obsessed with Japanese music. I think I was 11-years-old when I watched it and my mom always wondered why the hell her Filipino-American daughter was singing to all these Japanese songs. Well Mom, I love Cardcaptor Sakura. Done.

We are now entering into the fourth week of class session and I could barely keep up with my own schedule.  This being busy thing has been getting to me and this past week was really fcking terrible to say the least. I was 2 hours late for work on Wednesday which resulted in not only a bad start to my day, but an emotional Allison instead of the happy-go-lucky Allison coming into work. I feel like I'm lagging in my classes because I haven't been keeping up with any sort of reading, and my work ethic for both the sorority and the Daily 49er is so mediocre, I'm disappointed in myself. I've always been quite the perfectionist so when I feel I'm losing control of all my responsibilities, my brain turns to mush and I don't produce good work. In the midst of all this, I've been trying to make time for myself just so I can get back on my feet and snap out of this slump I'm in. So when I do have "me" time, I have these plans to work out, study, go shopping, etc.

I end up sleeping. 

But whatever! I feel refreshed and a lot better when I wake up so it's all good. I just get irritated because when I take my hardcore naps, my day is almost gone. Ever since I started opening at work, I've realized how many hours in the day I've been missing out on. Even after I graduate and I go back to closes or whatever, I'm still going to try to wake up early just so I can add more hours to my day. I feel accomplished when I've done a lot and I look at the time and it's barely 10 A.M. 

So I guess I'll rant about what's really bothering me. 

I know I tweet every now and then about my pet peeves, but now I can really go into detail about it. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people act bitchy for no good reason. I come across it everywhere - work, class, sorority, friends, etc. AND I'M SO SICK OF IT! I know I can be a bitch too sometimes, but I make it a point to apologize to the people I bitch at because I know I've crossed a line. But the people who feel like it's okay to talk to people like that... what's wrong with you? Seriously. It makes me wonder how the hell this generation is being raised. I mean, most of our parents are from the baby boomer years so I would think there's some good wholesome values in your parents but fckkk. Those values do NOT get translated well when you have a demeaning tone in your voice when you're talking to me. Let's get something straight. I'm terrible at confrontation. I always was, and probably might always will be. But I've been trying to get better. I know I'm in a position where confrontation is going to happen and I'm going to have to bite the bullet and become everyone's enemy at one point, but if it's for the better of the group, then I'll do it. I have an obligation to the group I'm in and I promised I would carry out my responsibilities to the best of my abilities.

I've talked to people about this before and I really hate when we play the whole "my life is sadder than your life" kind of game. First of all, what kind of sick, twisted person can you be if you're trying to one-up me in terms of life's devastation? You really think this is the only thing you can beat me at? It doesn't matter! Why should it be a contest and why are you trying to make it one? Just because I always have a smile on my face and a positive attitude, doesn't mean I'm not fighting my own inner demons. I think placing judgement on people is an even worse action so you might want to re-evaluate what the hell you find important in your life because for one, if it's trying to beat me, and two, if you're gonna judge my every move, then you need to aspire for more in life.

Because I'm going to be the bigger person, I'll make changes. Because I'm a leader who cares about the unity of our group. Changes WILL happen and I hope you notice them and it makes you feel more comfortable and inclined to TREAT PEOPLE BETTER. 

I think you're a misunderstood person. Because I know you, and I know you only act that way as a defense mechanism. But why are you putting up a guard at me? Fine, be angry that you didn't know some information that the rest of us did. But let the anger run its course then GET OVER IT. Don't take your frustrations out on me and be a smart ass about it. Last time I checked, I'm younger than you, yet you're acting like a little kid who doesn't get their way. 

There I said it. Whew. There you go, Internet World. You have some insight to how chaotic my mind is at the moment.

I know not every person I meet in life or work with in life is going to support me whole heartedly. I know there are people who are anticipating my failures and hoping the worst happens to me. It's life - not everyone is a buddy. But I would just like to give a big ass, I DON'T GIVE A FCK! I'm going to accept the haters and let them watch me conquer and destroy. You can watch me dominate that ladder of success because that's exactly where I'm headed. I don't have time to be at a stand still with people who are going to bring me down. Honey, you can't handle this.

Small girl, big dreams. Big dreams, little confidence.

I know I can do it though. I've made it this far - I know I can do it.

I feel a lot better admitting to not only myself but to the rest of the internet what I'm currently feeling. I know this semester is going to kick my ass, but if it didn't, then I wouldn't really be learning anything, right? 

More angry rants to come in the near future. I may be small, but I got a lot of voice in me. 

Fall Beginnings: The final countdown to graduation.

A picture of my dog, Miku, KOed.

Current mood: Tired

I decided to make yet another blog, but this time, I have no rules. I'm tired of rules, I'm tired of being restricted, and I'm tired of always being on an agenda. There's not a lot of times in my life where I can be completely spontaneous and just do whatever the hell I want, so I figured the best place to start is with a blog. Lol, shows how "wild" I am, huh? The fact that my idea of coloring outside the lines is to make a blog that has no particular focus. Hey, at least I'm not snorting any coke.

Fall semester has arrived and unlike previous semesters, I am already exhausted before anything's begun. This summer has made me work harder than I have ever worked in my entire 21 years of existence. Balancing an unpaid internship in Santa Monica, sorority, Anime Expo, Daily 49er, and Starbucks really took a lot out of me. And usually I have some crazy energy and drive to get me through it, but honestly, I'm feeling like this is the first time I'm genuinely getting tired from everything. Not in the sense where I wanna quit and just take the easy road, but that I just wanna hide away in my room and hibernate like a bear. I think it's because this past summer, I realized I grew up, and real life doesn't have moments where you can screw the rules and just live care-free of any responsibilities. When I realized that moment, I got kinda scared and a little sad. But then I got super excited, and I fell in love with the thrill of being busy and always having something to do. I think I've always been like this - it's just that now I'm older and not that naive 18-year-old straight out of high school who thinks she can fuck with the system. The system can easily fuck you over. You just need to bring out that survival instincts and street-smarts out of you and stand your ground. Once you know how to do that, you can breathe in the fresh air and strut your confident self around because you've earned it.

But sadly, I'm not there yet. I still have until next May until I graduate. Until then, I'm going to do everything in my power to summon some energy out of me so I can go about every task and responsibility like a boss. Oh and there's also the whole eat right, sleep early, work out BS that I'm trying to do too. I've started working out more frequently, but the challenge is to keep that drive going the entire semester. I'm contemplating on blogging about my weight loss journey. We'll see. If the next post you see is a picture of my beer belly, then you know it's game on. If not, well, I'm slowly getting there. It's hard to give up my love-borderline-obsession with hot cheetos and takis. and tacos. and french fries.

I will conclude my thoughts with this ridiculous video of some kids singing about their love of hot cheetos and takis. Knowing me, if I was 13-years-old, I would totally be that girl in the pink.